The Deaf Rogue

How High You Go

2011-09-10T03:47:00.002-04:00

I tied a rock

To a bird

To see if it could handle

The extra weight.

It struggled at first,

But eventually it mustered the strength

To fly over the trees

And out of sight.

Perhaps I should have tried

A bigger rock?

Or maybe how high

The bird can fly

Just isn't up to me.

Stifled Creativity

2011-08-31T02:50:00.004-04:00

My creativity will probably die

At a desk, or in a cubicle.

In an office on some rainy day

In mid-December,

Or in some business class seat

On a flight to some far away place.

My creativity will probably die,

But I can not step aside.

My legs will not allow me to.

Perhaps every step that I have taken

Up to this point

Has understood the burden

Of this seemingly inevitable truth?

My creativity will probably die

Because "they" will strike it down.

"They" will bludgeon it with grading scales and

Performance reviews.

Choke it with mortgages, college loans,

And insurance premiums.

"They" will lock my creativity away,

In some digitized safe,

To collect interest,

Compounded monthly.

My creativity will die,

And the only witnesses will be

The desks, the cubicles, the offices,

The business class seats,

And those rainy days in mid-December.

I hope you have better luck.

Green Lantern Impressions

2011-07-19T19:04:00.002-04:00

"Green Lantern" is yet another film that seems to fall victim to one of the very messages that it tries to preach. More specifically, the film somehow manages to squander practically every gift that it receives.

Millions of dollars in CGI, rich source material, and a decent cast can't save a film when the writing is weak on almost every level and the majority of said cast gives bland and forgettable performances (I say the majority because Mark Strong does manage to pull off a decent, if generally underused, Sinestro).

I am awarding "Green Lantern" one and a half stars out of five. All in all, it is probably the most disappointing film that I have seen so far this summer. If tons of CGI, or the fact that a film is based off of a popular comic series, are all that it takes for you to go see a movie, then you've probably already seen this film (or you are at least planning to see it in the near future). If those conditions don't apply to you, then I strongly suggest that you save your money. You aren't missing anything.

"Transformers: Dark of the Moon" Impressions

2011-07-16T10:06:00.005-04:00

"Transformers: Dark of the Moon" was significantly more entertaining than the two films that preceded it, which wasn't all that hard to accomplish, but just as poorly written. I mean, the logical gaps were just too excessive. While I was watching the movie, I actually came up with an alternate title that seemed much more fitting than "Dark of the Moon." I call it "Transformers: What Was Your Plan?!" Why, you ask? Because hardly a minute goes by where you don't want to ask that question. All of the character's actions seemed so impulsive and ill-conceived that you really have to wonder if the writers weren't just randomly stringing together index cards with ideas written on them. Yes, every last character. Even Optimus Prime himself made more than a few pointlessly stupid decisions. I am all for expensive CGI and whatnot, but if a film feels like it was written by the kid in the back of the class who flicks his boogers and just can't seem to sit still then I'm sorry, I just can not enjoy it.

I am awarding "Transformers: Dark of the Moon" two stars out of five for being as flashy as ever, but still very poorly written. Honestly, the film's masterstroke is definitely the fact that Leonard Nimoy voices a majorcharacter. That is really the only reason I could ever envision myself watching it again.

Out With The Old...

2011-07-12T21:34:00.006-04:00

So it has become fairly apparent to me that more than a few of the links that have previously been used on this blog have died for whatever reason. Most of the old content is still up and running, especially original stuff, so it shouldn't be too much of an issue. I will say, however, that the blog's new life starts now. Everything from this moment should be considered the result of a new outlook and a tempered perspective. Welcome to a new "Deaf Rogue."

Picture taken and edited by me.

I'm Not Dead! (Probably)

2011-07-03T20:18:00.002-04:00

So yeah, this blog has been inactive for a pretty long time. I really just dropped most of my ongoing projects when I started working at Target last summer. I am working to get things started up here again, and hopefully things will be better than they were the first time around.

Thank You, My Twilight (With English Lyrics)

2010-09-16T11:25:00.003-04:00

So the pillows turn twenty-one today and I just thought I'd take the time to share what has come to be my favorite song of theirs (which is saying a lot). Here's to another twenty-one years, guys!

English Lyrics*

Life, life is beautiful
My roulette keeps spinning
She, she is wonderful
I want to see the present in those eyes
Immediately I seized that feeling

It's as if I'm waiting for someone
If you appear, it won't be a mistake
I was waiting for you

Life, life is beautiful
I'll keep singing just as I speak
She, she is wonderful
Those words shine even in the darkness
Brilliant tears overflowed

Sometime they'll ask
"How long, how far does that feeling go?"
Baby, however far you want

Life, life is beautiful
My roulette keeps spinning
She, she is wonderful
I want to see the present in those eyes
Immediately I seized that feeling

Even if there is no miracle, it's enough, you know
Even if today is the last day
Thank you, my twilight
Thank you, my twilight

Summer 2010 Movie Review Backlog #2: The Karate Kid

2010-07-31T19:58:00.003-04:00

**Sorry for the lack of posting over this past month. I have been extremely lazy. August will be different, I promise. >_>

I am hesitant to even call this homage to the film that first used this title, but "The Karate Kid" was fairly entertaining to watch. Everything about the film was fairly standard, the choreography for the fights were decent, as was the general story of the film, but my biggest problem was the acting. I have never really liked Jaden Smith, and I certainly think that he has yet to prove himself as any kind of actor, but even beyond that, the only other actor in the film that gave even a decent performance was Jackie Chan. In fact, I think that it could easily be said that he carried the film. My only other issue with the film was that there was a very loose sense of time, and that made the whole pre-tournament part of the movie hard to watch.

I am awarding "The Karate Kid" two and a half stars out of five for be entertaining to watch (and for casting Jackie Chan) but for having fairly poor acting and a loose concept of time. I would definitely rent/Netflix/whatever this film, but it's certainly not collection worthy.

Let Me In Trailer #1

2010-07-02T10:49:00.002-04:00

[Video Link]

I have been fearing this day since I first heard about the American remake of 2008's (yes, 2008's!) "Let the Right One In" a few years ago, and it seems like my fears may have been well deserved. The original trailer for the film didn't rely on any dialogue or voice-overs, and came across as something much more intriguing and mysterious than the trailer for the remake. Don't get me wrong, it could still turn out to be a great film, I just fear that the new director is going to take to many chances with his "re-envisioning" of the story.

I am not going to lie, "Let the Right One In" is not only one of my favorite films, but one of my favorite books as well. This upcoming film has a lot to live up to, and from what I have read and seen so far it looks like it is going to be more of a localization than a remake.

Summer 2010 Movie Review Backlog #1: Iron Man 2 Impressions

2010-06-24T10:48:00.004-04:00

I was very disappointed with "Iron Man 2." The first film had a nice balance of action and humor while still making you feel like what you were seeing was important. "Iron Man 2," however, focuses far too much on the "humor" (bad jokes and overly long dialogue) and leaves you pondering the question of whether or not what you are watching is at all significant. Also, what little action there was felt kind of cheap. Not in flashiness, (it is still a big budget Marvel film), but in content. Every one of the three or so "fights" felt too easy and very much anticlimactic.

What "Iron Man 2" did well, though, was tease about three upcoming Marvel films. I won't say anything about them, but I will say that it just felt... wrong. Like my money was just being used for these other films and everything else they are showing me is just filler. Why can't they just make a solid film with all of the teasers and whatnot at the end?

The only thing I even remotely liked about the film was the acting, and like I said before, the dialogue did not do them any kind of service.

I am awarding "Iron Man 2" a very disappointing two and a half stars out of five for losing the feeling of "significance" that the first film had, having very little action, and for focusing too much on "humor." On a lighter note, however, I am now excited for those three other movies I mentioned. So, no big loss... right?

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 1 MTV Clip

2010-06-08T21:12:00.004-04:00

The closer this movie comes, the more sad I get... but still, I am fairly excited to see it. At least they are giving it the "two part" treatment. Anyway, watch and enjoy!

On a semi-related note, the Wizarding World of Harry Potter opens in a few weeks! Check out the site if you haven't already!

***Note: I apologize for the "lower" quality. Youtube took down the original upload so I just found a copy for myself.

Hey Ash, Whatcha Playin: Sleep Is Death

2010-05-28T11:09:00.002-04:00

[Video Link]

You never really realize how valuable your time is until someone is paying you for it.

Anyway, here is a "new" HAWP video (and by "new" I mean like a month old). Also, HAWP has a cool "new" site that you should totally check out. Anyway, enjoy your respective Memorial Day weekends (if you're in the states)! I won't be enjoying mine!

Inception Trailer 2

2010-05-14T13:04:00.002-04:00

[Video Link]

I can not wait to see this film. Not only does it seem interesting and engaging, but it also plays host to a great cast of actors. Circle July 16th on your calendars!

Jonah Hex Trailer

2010-05-06T12:26:00.004-04:00

[Video Link]

I will admit, I was moderately intrigued by this film when I first heard about it, and considerably intrigued when I saw the cast listing. But now that I've seen the first trailer, I honestly don't know what to think. I mean, it just doesn't look especially "cool," you know? Ah well, the film is dated for June 18th so I suppose we will find out soon enough.

This Day in Calvin and Hobbes: April 30, 1993

2010-04-30T20:17:00.007-04:00

Spaceman Spiff just can't seem to go anywhere without dangerous aliens popping up. What a life.

The Last Airbender Trailer 3

2010-04-26T21:28:00.005-04:00

[Video Link]

The more I see of this film, the more serious it looks. Where are the jokes? Where is the humor? I will admit that the bending looks great, but "Avatar: The Last Airbender" was not all action. I don't think that I have seen the kid playing Aang do so much as crack a smile even once. I am still anxious to see this film, despite the casting choices and the seriousness, but that is mostly because I just want to get it out of the way.

Kick-Ass Impressions

2010-04-20T17:43:00.005-04:00

I can't say that I had high hopes going into this film, having not read the comics (though I wasn't expecting the movie to be 100% true to them) and not recognizing any of the actors other than Nicolas Cage and "McLovin," but I can definitely say that I was pleased with what I saw.

My greatest fear, at least after seeing the trailers, was that "Kick-Ass" would be more of a spoof of a "superhero" movie than one in its own right, but there was certainly enough grit and action to keep the audience engaged. The best thing about the film, though, was definitely the fact that it never took itself too seriously. There were buckets of blood and copious amounts of violence, but it all just felt fun. Maybe the zany choice of music did a great deal of helping, but never before (and perhaps never again) has watching a little girl in a mask and a cape take out an entire room of drug dealers with various bladed weaponry been so hilarious.

Anyway, there really isn't too much to say beyond that. My biggest problems with the film were that too many things felt unbelievably convenient and that the acting ranged from fairly mediocre to outright cheesy. Maybe it was simply supposed to be commentary on the "traditional" superhero movie, but I just found it to be annoying.

I am awarding "Kick-Ass" four stars out of five for being gritty and fun to watch, but still lacking a strong cast and for being overly convenient. If you don't mind a great deal of violence and swearing, then "Kick-Ass" is definitely the film for you. Otherwise, you might want to see something else because you will most likely be doing some seat squirming if you choose to see this.

Prince of Persia Trailer #2

2010-04-11T16:25:00.004-04:00

[Video Link]

I want to not have mixed feelings about this film, I really do, but I just can't get over some of the scenes and lines in these trailers. It could go either way at this point. I guess we will just have to wait until May 28th to find out whether or not the action can drown out the cheesy dialogue.

Repo Men Impressions

2010-04-05T10:54:00.008-04:00

Before I get into my review, I want to put one thing to rest: "Repo Men" is in no way a "rip-off" of "Repo! The Genetic Opera". The former was based off of a novel written by Eric Garcia in 2001 (though it wasn't published until 2009), who got his inspiration from a short story he had written in 1997. In that regard, however, I am not saying that "Repo! The Genetic Opera" took anything from "Repo Men." The two films are very much different from one another and each have their own inspirations.

Now, for my review. I will start by saying that "Repo Men" was not the poorly crafted film the critics said it was going to be. The acting was solid, the cinematography wasn't too overblown, it was in no way unentertaining, and the story wasn't nearly as washed out and political as many current filmmakers would have taken the liberty to make it. To be honest, I really think that critics dropped the ball on this one, though I suppose that could be said of most critics most of the time.

First, what worked best for the film: the straightforward simplicity and the music. As I said before, "Repo Men" was not the heavy political satire it could have been. There were no corrupt politicians or business men or moral high grounds. Just a company that sold synthetic organs, people that wanted them, and individuals hired to repossess said organs if the client couldn't keep up with their payments. Also, the main characters weren't out to "take down the system." They were about 99.9% in it for themselves. That being said, the film was not overly predictable either. There were still plenty of twists and turns all the way through that culminate in an ending that will probably surprise you, though you may have seen it before. As for the music, I have to say that "Repo Men" has one of the most dynamic and well chosen soundtracks I have heard in a long time (in terms of using music not especially recorded for the film). Instead of just having songs that happen to be popular or that "sound" appropriate, the film uses songs that fit on both a rhythmical and lyrical level.

What didn't work for the film: the shallow character introductions (which hurts their development) and the ending. By the end of the film, I didn't really feel like I "knew" many of the characters and some of the people I saw the film with didn't even know most of the character's names. You see the characters do things and get a semblance of what their respective personalities are like, but you don't really get to know who they were before the events of the film or what they might be doing beyond what you see in the story. As for the ending, I don't want to give anything away, but I will say that it is one of those endings that explains a lot of the events you witness prior to it, but at the same time disappoints you for the things that it has "undone." Also, as a hint, I will say that I have seen an ending almost exactly like it in the "non-wholesome edit" of an 80's science fiction film.

I am awarding "Repo Men" three and a half stars out of five for being entertaining, relatively unpredictable, and for having a great soundtrack, but also for having weak character introductions and a fairly disappointing ending. I definitely thought that this film was worth the money I spent to see it, which is more than I can say for most of the films I have recently gone to see.

Wishes + Tied Down

2010-03-31T16:17:00.009-04:00

So yeah, a "few" months ago I put my acrostic series on hold so that I could get back to my "usual" style of writing... beginning with this.

And now for why I threw a rant tag on this post. My process for writing, and photography too I suppose, is that I come up with a concept, write a poem, take a picture that I think fits that poem, and then I write another poem that directly applies to the picture. So yeah, two poems, one picture (if you get what I am playing off of with that then I am truly, truly sorry).

Anyway, I thought it was a shame not to share all of the results of my "process" on here so I am going to start including the "picture specific" poem after the "concept specific" one. The picture specific poems are usually shorter and less formal so I didn't think it'd be that big of a deal. Enjoy!

Wishes

Wishes are such
Silly things.

We send them into the sky,
Like colorful little balloons,
Hoping that one or two
Will bump into someone "up there"
And they, in turn,
Will answer our
Requests.

We send them up
By the dozen,
By the tens of hundreds of dozens,
Yet we only dare to hope
For one or two
To be answered.
Why is that?

Do we feel the need for
Modesty?
Wishes are selfish.
Regardless of our
Intentions,
Each one is essentially
Just for us.
What does it matter
If we push
The line
Between "very selfish"
And "mostly selfish?"

Do we not feel that
Every wish
Is worth the answer?
Wishes are invaluable.
Beneath that thin layer of rubber
Someone's hopes and dreams
Bounce back and forth
Like hundreds of hungry
Molecules
Eager for release.
Why dream at all
If any one dream
Is less important
Than the last?

Do we feel that
We are not strong enough
To handle
More than one or two?
Wishes are empowering.
They help us maintain
The belief
That there is something special
Out there
Waiting just for us.
Why burden yourself with
Life, at all,
If something so simple
Is too much
To believe?

Wishes are empowering,
Invaluable,
Selfish,
And silly.

I understand all of this,
Yet I just can not seem
To get my wish
Off the ground.

Could you help me with the knot?

Copyright © 2009 Jarred Lee

Tied Down

We were meant
For the sky.

We were meant
To touch the clouds
High above your heads
Without having to worry
About looking down.

Yet you have found the
"Need"
To tie us to the ground,
To your flightless situation.

You have found it
"Necessary"
To tie us to your cruel fate.

You may think it
Amusing
To watch us suffer,
But we were not meant
For this place,
This life,
And we are running out
Of oxygen.

Set us free.

Copyright © 2009 Jarred Lee

Scott Pilgrim vs. The World Trailer 1

2010-03-29T03:04:00.006-04:00

[Video Link]

As much as I dislike Michael Cera (I am tired of seeing him play "awkward teenage boy" in every one of his films), I would be a complete and total liar if I said that this movie doesn't look awesome. On a side note, I am really glad to see that more and more non-mainstream comics are getting film adaptations. Hollywood seems to be taking less liberties with their stories (because that makes perfect sense) and has been making them look fairly amazing.

Anyway, enjoy the trailer!

Alice in Wonderland Impressions

2010-03-24T23:07:00.003-04:00

In spite of all I have said about Tim Burton in the past, I will admit that "Alice in Wonderland" had the potential to be a great movie. The acting was decent, though Alice felt very bland at times, the voice work was great, and the visuals were amazing.

Pretty much everything else, however, was rather terrible. The story and the dialogue felt forced and awkward, especially a lot of the insertions of lines from Lewis Carroll's work, and far too many convenient solutions revealed themselves in light of the character's problems. You never feel like any of the characters are in danger and all you can really do is sit back and watch things happen. There also seemed to be quite a few pacing with the film issues as all of the events outside of "Underland" felt rushed and shallow (there are barely any formal introductions to the "real"characters) and in Underland events seem sporadic and whimsically arranged. This especially hurts the ending of the film because it is really difficult to know what to make of things. More than a few of the liberties taken with the original work felt needless and awkward as well.

I am awarding Tim Burton's "Alice in Wonderland" one and a half stars out of five for having potential, but not doing anything with said potential. By the end of the film, you will have no choice but to wonder whether or not the visuals alone can make this film worth the time and money you spent on it. In my case... they just couldn't do it.

Defendor Trailer

2010-03-22T10:36:00.003-04:00

[Video Link]

Although this film has technically already released theatrically, I am sure that most of you have never heard of it. I have really been getting to like Woody Harrelson, though, so I thought that I would post the trailer for the film before its DVD release in April. This film reminds me a lot of 2006's "Special" with Michael Rapaport, but the story looks a bit wider in scope and more interesting. Anyway, enjoy!

Drawn Together

2010-03-15T21:42:00.015-04:00

Acrostic: "A poem or series of lines in which certain letters, usually the first in each line, form a name, motto, or message when read in sequence."

This is the tenth entry in my Acrostic Adventure series. I wrote it back in August and took a break from this particular series to get back to my usual style. Why is Alice taking him to the very place that she kept him from going earlier? Exactly what is it that she wishes him to do?

**I shrank the text to better preserve the line spacing.

Drawn Together

Presumption foolishly ventures to pluck the most beautiful red
Apple from a tree that is twisted and withered to its core.
Poison has never before tasted so sweet.
Entranced by Alice's palatial promise, he pushes open the
Rusted rear gateway to the Overlooked Palace.

An ancient and decomposing mausoleum lays itself out before them like a
Nocturnal wonderland of death and decay.
Dreary specters silently perform their dismal waltz across the somber scene.

Ghosts of Overlooked Kings and Queens
Long since turned to dust.
Unity is the rose-colored placebo that
Eases the pain of relentless aging.

Copyright © 2009 Jarred Lee

New Iron Man 2 Trailer

2010-03-09T21:34:00.002-05:00

[Video Link]

I was wondering when they were going to give us a new Iron Man 2 trailer. They showed the old one during the previews before "Shutter Island" and I was kind of disappointed. Ah well. Enjoy! The film is due for release in American theaters on May 7th!

Shutter Island Impressions

2010-03-08T21:02:00.002-05:00

I had high hopes for "Shutter Island," it being a Scorsese film and all, and I can happily say that I wasn't completely disappointed. The film was well shot, well acted (Leonardo DiCaprio was especially fantastic), and will keep you intrigued from beginning to end (though I found the ending to be fairly disappointing, personally).

My biggest issue with the film had to be the editing. I can appreciate the fact that "Shutter Island" wants to play with your mind, but changing filters at random times for seemingly no reason and random breaks in shot consistency is far too self-indulgent. Scorsese tries so hard to convey the instability of the film that you are left wondering if what you have seen was purposely done or an if a few inconsistencies slipped past the editors.

I am awarding "Shutter Island" three and a half stars out of five for being well acted and intriguing, but for having distracting (an often annoying) editing work and a somewhat disappointing ending. This film is definitely worth the watch, even if you only want to see how things pan out, but don't feel bad if you want to wait for a rental.

Hey Ash, Whatcha Playin: Psychonauts

2010-03-06T11:15:00.002-05:00

[Video Link]

"Ash dives into your brain!"

Haha, I suppose some minds are just better off unread. But still, that looked kind of painful.

This Day in Calvin and Hobbes: February 24, 1986

2010-02-24T19:41:00.002-05:00

I miss getting points for originality... even if that was just a nice way of saying that you were completely wrong.

Toy Story 3 Trailer #2

2010-02-19T16:04:00.003-05:00

[Video link]

Wow, this trailer was far more enjoyable than the first one. It is able to showcase the humor and personality that made the first two films great while still explaining the "Brave Little Toaster"-esque premise (not that the comparison is at all a bad thing). I can't wait to see it in June. Enjoy!

The Wolfman Impressions

2010-02-14T20:37:00.003-05:00

Before I get into the review, I will just say that I was never a fan of "The Wolf Man." Nothing against the original film, or anything, I just never really liked the "man turns into unthinking monster" premise. It just makes it difficult to feel sympathy for the charcter.

Anyway, I thought that "The Wolfman" stayed true to the original film while still managing to add a few new twists that didn't undo everything. That being said, though, I actually would have liked to see a bigger twist regarding the ending... but I won't say more than that. The acting was decent for the most part, but none of the characters felt genuine or engaging so it was kind of difficult to connect with them. Even the "big" characters felt somewhat shallow and at times distant. For instance, I would have loved to learn more about Hugo Weaving's "Francis Aberline" other than the fact that he "worked on the Ripper case a few years back." The film makes you feel like you are just watching stale characters play out their respective parts in between gory slaughter scenes. On that note, the film's strongest point was definitely the visuals, and the decision to use costume and make-up in the fashion of the original film for the wolf (instead of solely relying on CGI) was commendable as well.

I am awarding "The Wolfman" three stars out of five for accomplishing what it set out to do, creating a respectable remake a classic film, and nothing more. If you have seen absolutely everything else on your list, then I would suggest that you give it a shot, but don't expect to be impressed.

The Last Airbender Trailer

2010-02-10T22:24:00.007-05:00

[video link]

So, here it is. Your first "The Last Airbender" theatrical trailer. I will admit that the effects look nice, but I am still upset with most of the casting decisions. Ah well, take a look for yourself. Enjoy!

Just as a note, I have decided to start putting the links for the videos under their respective embeds to make it easier for Facebook people.

Hey Ash, Whatcha Playin: The Most Dangerous Game

2010-02-03T22:38:00.005-05:00

"Pokemon is a very dangerous game."

Wow, it has been a long time since I posted one of these. At least this one is funny, though. Enjoy.

Repo Men Trailer

2010-01-31T02:38:00.002-05:00

I can't say that I haven't seen this concept before, but the absence of singing and (hopefully) the lack of cheesiness will make this film worth the watch. The cast looks like it should be able to deliver, Jude Law and Forest Whitaker have rarely been known to do a poor job, but the real question is whether or not the script and the story will pan out. Ah well, "Repo Men" seem promising enough and April 2010 release date means that we won't have to wait too long to find out. The link to the official trailer is below. Enjoy.

Repo Men Official Trailer Page

Season of the Witch Trailer

2010-01-25T02:42:00.006-05:00

Just how many upcoming films is Nicolas Cage starring in? I know he is in desperate need of work because of his recent financial troubles, but this is just ridiculous. He just seems to be popping up everywhere these days.

Anyway, "Season of the Witch" looks like it could be fairly interesting (regardless of the above), and this trailer sported a glimpse of a significantly deformed Christopher Lee and the always gruff Ron Perlman so I will definitely keep a spot open in my schedule for it. The film is currently due for release on March 19th and the link to the trailer can be found below. Enjoy.

Official Trailer Page

High Up Above

2010-01-18T20:52:00.006-05:00

Acrostic: "A poem or series of lines in which certain letters, usually the first in each line, form a name, motto, or message when read in sequence."

This is the ninth entry in my Acrostic Adventure series. The mystery girl reveals herself to be an Overlooked Princess. Will our lonely wanderer regain his senses in time to realize that she is only using him for her own purposes? Or perhaps this is what he wanted all along?

High Up Above

Dangerous thoughts and ideals scatter
Across the palely lit sky like a
Never ending assault on the stars.
Constellations mix and swirl
In rapid succession until
Nothing distinguishable remains.
Grace swallowed by unbridled emotion.

Will he be pulled in by such lofty hopes and
Irrational reasonings?
To think an overlooked princess such as
Her would seek out someone so lost.

The bizarre twilight scene uses this moment's hesitation to
Haunt his vision and arrest his judgment,
Enticing him further into Alice's hold.

Malevolent games played amongst
Overlooked royalty.
Only you can decide how high you go.
Never allow yourself to believe otherwise.

Copyright © 2009 Jarred Lee

Daybreakers Impressions

2010-01-12T21:04:00.004-05:00

There just isn't much to say about "Daybreakers." The acting was good, and the futuristic vampire world was shiny, but everything else was just... stale. There just never seemed to be a real sense of purpose in the film. The protagonists were really just reacting to whatever unfortunate situations they happened upon, conveniently overcoming them, and then getting to ride away into the sunset to a cheesy "we're out there" voice over. The time frame of the film was also completely skewed as I wasn't sure if the events took place within days, weeks, or even months.

I am awarding "Daybreakers" three stars out of five for... well... being a movie. I neither liked nor disliked it and it didn't really try anything out of the ordinary. I had high hopes for this film, but I suppose it will eternally be known as my first disappointment of 2010. Ah well, I hope "The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus" fairs better... when I can finally track it down.

The Fading of the Cries Trailer

2010-01-09T14:51:00.003-05:00

I am having some very mixed feelings about this trailer. The story looks like it could be fairly interesting (albeit a bit generic) and the art direction is somewhat unique, but there are times when the CGI looks terrible and the acting comes off as stiff. Also, the lead actor is the kid that you may remember from "Rookie of the Year" or "A Kid in King Arthur's Court," and the main villain is the guy who played Wormtongue in the "Lord of the Rings" films. Anyway, I will definitely be keeping a lookout for "The Fading of the Cries," but it will be anyone's guess as to whether or not it will get a full theatrical release.

Matt Smith is Doctor Who...? (Preview Clip)

2010-01-03T13:40:00.003-05:00

Why the question mark, you ask? Well, though this is just a short preview (about a minute long), I have already seen Matt Smith punch someone, hit what seems to be a Dalek with what seems to be a sledge hammer, and shoot a gun. Oh, and all while looking roughly 16-18 years old. I am happy to be rid of Russel T Davies, but this younger, overly eager Doctor just doesn't sit well with me. I guess only Spring 2010 will tell whether or not it works. Until then Matt Smith. Until then.

Inception Trailer

2009-12-30T02:31:00.006-05:00

Christopher Nolan's latest thriller finally has a trailer to go with the unusual poster. I am kind of upset that they used the "From the director of 'The Dark Knight'" tagline as this film looks much closer to something like "Memento" or "Insomnia," but I guess you have to use your biggest success when it counts. Ah well. "Inception" looks like it will be fairly interesting from what I can see, but further explanation will be much appreciated. Also, yes, that is Ellen Page you see there. I will be seeing this opening weekend. The link to the official trailer page is below. You should click it.

Trailer Page

Avatar Impressions

2009-12-26T17:57:00.009-05:00

I came into this film as skeptical as anyone else (I even called it "Pocahontas in Space" for a few months prior to its release), but I was very much impressed with what I saw, both during the regular viewing and the digital 3D viewing.

First, I think I will go ahead and get the smaller bits out of the way: the acting was good, the characters were interesting, the music was kind of what you would expect from a movie like this (switching between large orchestrated pieces and more tribal drum beats with "singing"). There.

Now what really stood out in "Avatar" was, of course, the CGI work. Pandora was simply beautiful and all of its creatures were just as impressive. What impressed me the most, however, were the Na'vi (the tribals). They were perfectly crafted down to the smallest details and, unlike the "prawns" in "District 9," they fit well into the environment (they weren't over animated). The voice work and motion capture work for the was exceptional as well.

What seems to be drawing the most attention for "Avatar" is the "familiarity" of the plot (which is understandable). Sure, it isn't particularly deep or unpredictable, but it isn't anything less than what you'd see from any Disney classic. Also, this film is only relatable to all of those other films from the most basic and general viewpoints. Man meets tribal race. Tribal race takes man in for one reason or another and teaches him their ways. Man falls in love with a tribal and ends up saving them from his own people. End. "Avatar" as a whole, however, feels like much more than that. The avatar technology alone is enough to give this film suitable distinction, and that still leaves out a lot of the other factors (like the whole bio-USB thing).

I am awarding "Avatar" four and a half stars out of five for being wonderfully crafted, but still lacking a bit plot-wise. This film reminded me of exactly what I liked about "Pocahontas" and science fiction and I would definitely recommend that you see it (especially in 3D). This is the first movie that I am actually anticipating the Blu-ray release of.

Merry Christmas/Happy Holidays!

2009-12-25T15:20:00.006-05:00

Merry Christmas/Happy Holidays everyone! I hope your respective days are filled with good food and tons of presents. Here are this year's Christmas poems, just in time.

Ornaments

The only ornament on my tree
Is a little golden orb for all to see.

No hats, no trains,
No tinkertoys.
No candy canes,
No Christmas joys.

No musical doves,
No musical bears,
No little Christmas gloves
No little wooden chairs.

Just a little golden orb for all to see
That's all I need upon my tree.

Copyright © 2009 Jarred Lee

Like Diamonds From the Sky

Snow like diamonds from the sky
Comes down in gentle torrents,
And everywhere I dare to look
Is a season in full bloom.

Miss Crosby stands behind the same old
Green folding table she has stood behind every year
Pouring hot cocoa like liquid Christmas
For anyone who can spare a dime,
And for anyone who could use one.

Old man Peterson pushes smooth jazz
Out of a rusty, dusty saxophone
On the same corner he seems to find every wintry night.
The only pauses his ancient fingers make
Are to gesture towards the upturned hat at his feet.

The many stores and shops,
Each on the brink of dormancy,
Light the streets so brightly
That you'd have to occasionally look up again
To make sure the sun still remained somewhere past the horizon.
Inside of each you can still see the shuffling and bustling
Of last minute shoppers in an eager panic
To find those last minute gifts,
Or suitable substitutes.

Below my feet lie dozens of shoe prints,
Each pair belonging to men, women, and children
Who are probably at home right now
Dreaming of adventures to come
And adventures that have already begun to fray around the edges.

Stray animals and creatures of the night
Patrol the alleyways and sidewalks in anxious anticipation of the
Leftover meals that are sure to arrive after belts have been loosened
And pants are unbuckled.

Yes, the holiday season is in full bloom with its
Unbuckled pants and anxious animals.
Its dream-scape adventures, last minute shoppers,
And shining lights.
Its ancient fingers, smooth jazz, and rusty, dusty saxophones.
Its folding tables and liquid Christmas.

Oh, and let us not forget those many sparkling diamonds
Falling from the sky.

I enjoy them the most.

Copyright © 2009 Jarred Lee

Iron Man 2 Trailer

2009-12-21T11:35:00.002-05:00

Iron Man 1, or "Maybe Next Time" as some refer to it, promised us a few things. From what I have seen of Iron Man 2, including this trailer, I think I can safely say that it is going to start delivering on those promises. More action, greater enemies, that Starkian humor we all know and love, and Warmachine. What more could you want? The film is currently scheduled for release on May 7th, 2010 so be prepared for the advertising storm that is sure to start soon.

Also, as with most of the trailers I embed here, I have no clue how long the "powers that be" at Youtube will let it stay up so be prepared to search for yourself.

New Alice in Wonderland Trailer

2009-12-16T11:37:00.004-05:00

So I still won't say that I am much of a Tim Burton fan, not much at all really, but I will admit that this trailer looks much more promising than the first one. This film is currently being billed as an "extension" to both "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland" and "Through the Looking-Glass" where we will see Alice visiting Wonderland for a second time, though she doesn't remember anything from her first journey. Like many Disney films these day, "Tim Burton's Alice in Wonderland" will be presented in both Disney Digital 3-D and a normal format and is slated to be released on March 5, 2010. Click the link below to go to the official trailer page.

Trailer Page

The Sorcerer's Apprentice Trailer

2009-12-14T01:01:00.006-05:00

A film based off of a part of one of my favorite Disney films and starring two of my least favorite actors? I'd like to wake up now, please. This nightmare is starting to get a bit too real. Yet more proof that Jerry Bruckheimer will produce almost anything. Take a look for yourself. Link below.

Trailer Page

Down the Rabbit Hole

2009-12-10T11:51:00.004-05:00

Acrostic: "A poem or series of lines in which certain letters, usually the first in each line, form a name, motto, or message when read in sequence."

This is the eighth entry in my Acrostic Adventure series. So the girl has finally shown him the way to her home, her sanctuary. But why? How can he help her? What does she see in him that outshines all of the others in this dreary dystopia?

Down the Rabbit Hole

A pair of twisted gray trees entwined
Like long lost lovers locked
In a deep, tearful embrace.
Cries sent skyward to the multitude of
Ears that no longer care to listen.

Is he a fool for following her into such a foreboding place?
Nothing worth knowing comes without a price.

Wilt and rust enforce their cold
Oppression with little mercy.
Never before has he seen such wanton
Disregard for appearances.
Even so, he can still sense that this is the last bit of
Resistance to be found in this lucid city.
Lights flicker across the cove as
Alice motions him over to an old tire swing.
Never allow your curiosity to be swayed by reason.
Destinations are only as interesting as the journeys preceding them.

Copyright © 2009 Jarred Lee

New Moon Impressions

2009-12-07T20:20:00.006-05:00

Yet again I am forced to overcome my desire to be subjective and rate this purely on it's own merits. Sure, I'd like to say that I believe the Twilight series is a prime example of what is wrong with literature today. Sure, I'd like to berate this film for its nearly unbearable cheesiness... but I won't. I am sure you have already done plenty of that yourselves. Anyway, let's get to it.

Overall, New Moon felt kind of pointless. It seemed to be more of a teaser for the rest of the series than a sequel to the first film. The majority of the "interesting" characters were gone within the first half hour and all we were left with was... Bella. Well, the Werewolves too, I suppose, but Bella absorbed the majority of the screen time. I would say that she overacted in most of here scenes, but that would really be too nice. She was just... bad. I also found Jacob to be just as annoying, with his bipolar moodiness and questionable loyalties, but at least he had the Werewolf thing to fall back on. By the hour mark I actually found myself wanting the poorly crafted "vampires" to reappear because I never realized how much of the over-the-top teen angst they were protecting me from.

Still, I just couldn't shake the moderate interest that formed during the first film. You may scoff, but I have to honestly say that New Moon never bored me. Whether I was laughing hysterically or writhing in pain, I still wanted to know how things played out. So yeah, I guess that's the closest to a compliment as I can give this film.

I am awarding New Moon two and a half stars for being... well... bad, but still slightly interesting. I was going to give it half a star less than Twilight... but at least the Volturi were kind of interesting (they came the closest to the image of traditional vampires). There, done. I am now going to watch "Let the Right One In" to get this out of my head. It will be just my luck, though, if the American remake features sparkles though. I may be forced to move if that happens.

Catching Up With HAWP

2009-12-06T11:37:00.005-05:00

"The Burches enter the sordid world of DVD board games."

"Ash pitches her movie idea."

"Enough mind-bending similarities to detonate your dome?"

"The ballad of the Boomer."

It has been forever since I poseted one of these... so I thought I'd just catch up in one big HAWP post. Great idea, huh? Enjoy! The L4D2 one was definitely my favorite. Por que?!!!!

Percy Jackson & the Olympians: Lightning Thief Trailer

2009-12-01T15:43:00.003-05:00

I don't know much about the series of books this film is based off of, but this trailer is interesting enough. I will have to keep an eye out for it. Oh, and Uma Thurman is going to be playing Medusa. Please feel free to laugh unabatedly.

2012 Impressions

2009-11-30T19:02:00.002-05:00

The trailers did not do this film any justice, which is probably why I was so surprised by the fact that it was reasonably enjoyable. Sure, some parts of "2012" were as utterly ridiculous as the trailers made them out to be (like escaping an active volcano in an RV), but when you cut those parts away you are left with a very decent film.

What I liked most about "2012" would most definitely be the characters. Now, I don't think any of the actors did a particularly amazing job, but you have to give them some credit for portraying these often loved, often hated people. You will be happy when some characters get what is coming to them and scared when it looks like a character you are fond of is about to die. This aspect really saved the film because the conflict was kind of lackluster because there wasn't really much anyone could about their plight besides try to survive and make long, philosophical speeches. This is kind of why I have never been a fan of disaster movies, besides "The Poseidon Adventure" and maybe "Twister," but I will digress.

I am awarding "2012" three and a half stars out of five for having interesting characters, but still suffering from many of the failings akin to the disaster film and having some absolutely unbelievable moments. Honestly, I can't wait for Universal Studios or Disney to unveil their "2012" themed ride. I mean seriously, outdriving a world ending earthquake with a limousine? That screams 3-D adventure.

Clash of the Titans Trailer

2009-11-25T21:01:00.004-05:00

Sigh, yet another "reboot" of a classic film. While I will admit that it "looks" good, I can only wonder if the seemingly heavy reliance on special effects will move the story away from the legend, and turn it into some sort of blood and gore mongering 300/Lord of the Rings hybrid. Hell, I could have sworn some of the scenes I saw in this trailer were ripped right out of those films. Ah well, I will post more info as it comes. As of now, the film is set to release worldwide on March 26, 2010.

Dragon Ball Online Trailer

2009-11-22T03:38:00.003-05:00

I heard about this years ago, but I never thought it would ever make it out production hell. I guess things finally came together.

So... umm... watch your back World of Warcraft? Yeah...

Fantastic Mr. Fox Trailer

2009-11-18T00:42:00.007-05:00

I like Wes Anderson movies, and Jason Schwartzman, far too much to ignore this film. Also, it's based off of a book of the same name that written by Roald Dahl so that's a big plus as well. "The Fantastic Mr. Fox" features the voices of George Clooney, Meryl Streep, Bill Murray, Owen Wilson, Jason Schwartzman (as I said before), and Willem Dafoe, among others, and I have heard good things about it and I hope to see it after its nationwide release on the 25th of this month.

On a side note, can you believe that "2012" made $65 million in its opening weekend here in the U.S., and $160 million overseas? I sure can't. Sure, it didn't have much to complete with, but it looked ridiculous. Is that what people want now? Sigh.

Pirate Radio (The Boat That Rocked) Impressions

2009-11-13T10:28:00.003-05:00

"Pirate Radio," as it is called in the US (I saw the UK version), is an excellent film that really captures the passion of the time period. The acting was great, the characters were unique and "colorful," and the soundtrack was perfectly chosen. And when I say perfectly, I mean that if you don't end up looking for one of these songs and the history of the band behind it, then you obviously watched the film on mute.

The only problem I had with the film was that the "villain" never makes a direct appearance to the other main characters. He is always shown at a separate location, delegating responsibility to his spineless underlings. I really would have loved to see the main characters mince words with him.

I am awarding "Pirate Radio" four stars out of five for being funny and well "scored," but lacking in a few areas. Critics have criticized the film for its two hour+ running time and the American version is going to be shortened accordingly (even though the original cut was longer). Honestly, I hate that this is being done because I wish it were longer. You really start to feel like you're on the ship yourself and leaving it so soon kind of hurts a little bit. Don't listen to the critics, see this film!

This Day in Calvin and Hobbes: November 9, 1988

2009-11-09T10:12:00.004-05:00

Oh yeah, Calvin? Try living there.

Oh, and Hobbes really doesn't have anything to complain about. It's not like he can do much until Calvin gets back home anyway.

Toy Story 3 Trailer

2009-11-07T13:07:00.002-05:00

I am sure most of you have already seen this, but I thought I'd put it up here just in case you needed the reference. I know that I will love this movie and I am pretty excited about it, but when I first saw this trailer I couldn't help but think "The Brave Little Toaster?" I figured it would have to come to this eventually, though. Anyway, enjoy.

Prince of Persia Trailer

2009-11-02T20:46:00.003-05:00

Well, here it is. I can't say that I was expecting better. I guess we will just have to wait and see if the film can surpass this trailer. I sure hope it can.

P.S. Sorry about the poor quality, I will be on the lookout for a higher quality version.

P.S.S. HD version found and embeded. Enjoy... ish?

Happy Hour and a Half After Halloween!

2009-11-01T01:32:00.003-04:00

So I'm late... here is this year's Halloween poem! I think it's a worthy successor to last year's. Also, my roommates and I watched "Ringu" earlier (the Japanese horror film that inspired the American version, and it turned out to be a huge let down. It was much more annoying than scary. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed the day in whatever your usual way happens to be.

Shallow Graves

I dug a grave for you that day,
And I dug a grave for me.
Two graves I dug alone that day,
Near that cottage by the sea.

The wind was bitter, full of spite,
And filled with iced debris.
But still I dug those graves for us
Near that cottage by the sea.

The waters thundered against the rock
And swallowed up my plea
For a shred of silence while I worked
Near that cottage by the sea!

When I pushed you in, your eyes stared up
Begging to be set free.
But I broke your gaze, like you broke my heart,
Near that cottage by the sea.

Your eyes begged for mercy, tenderness,
But to that I could not agree.
Were your eyes so grim, when you met with him
Near that cottage by the sea?

You may take your mercy, and tenderness,
To cold eternity!
For I could never let you find peace
Near that cottage by the sea!

When you were covered, firm and pressed,
I smiled out of glee
And stepped into my own resting place
Near that cottage by the sea.

I then took a swig (oh, how sweet it was!)
From that bottle half empty
And blanketed myself in cool, damp earth
Near that cottage by sea.

As I lolled there, I thought of you
My poor, sweet, ruinous Marie.
Was that the fate we were meant to take
Near that cottage by sea?

A sudden gasp, an empty breath,
As the numbness took hold of me.
My eyes grew dim, my light gone out,
Near that cottage by the sea.

So there we lay, the three of us,
A star-crossed family.
You, and I, and his unborn child
Near that cottage by the sea.

Copyright © 2009 Jarred Lee

Creeps

2009-10-30T16:36:00.005-04:00

So in honor of it almost being Halloween, here is a poem that I wrote around this time last year. Enjoy.

Creeps

There's a monster hiding 'neath my bed,
And it fills my heart all full of dread,
For calm leaves fear in its stead.
A creeping in the night.

I trouble my guardian for a light to borrow
So I may push back this gripping sorrow.
"Save all complaints for the 'morrow!"
A shrieking in the night.

How coldly she does reject my plea;
She says an orphan should never cry, you see?
Bad children are locked away without a key.
A squeaking in the night.

But what if this ghoul is so full of spite
That it pops up here for a bite?
The very thought is such a fright!
A weeping in the night.

To look under my cot, I wouldn't dare,
For its malicious gaze, I couldn't bare.
Eyes of the Styx and keeper of its fare.
A reaping in the night.

Yes, I will wait here for the sun to rise
And cast away this night's cruel guise,
But you can never truly know in what tomorrow lies.
A creeping in the night.

Copyright © 2008 Jarred Lee

Where the Wild Things Are Impressions

2009-10-28T20:21:00.006-04:00

Alright, since I took such a long time to put this up, I will get right to the point. "Where the Wild Things Are" was a wonderfully imaginative, beautifully scored, and tastefully dark film. The characters were also likable in their own ways and the cast did an excellent job with their respective roles (especially Max Records, of course). While some of the plot was a little messy (especially before Max travels to the land of the wild things) I believe that the film was an excellent adaptation of the relatively small source material.

Now, for what surprised me. First, the depth. Now, I am sure that you expected something more than ten sentences out of a feature length film, but "Where the Wild Things Are" really makes you think. The film takes the idea of the "wild things" and instead of just making them creatures created by Max's imagination, they each become representative of different aspects of his life. I won't go too much into this, though, because it will be more enjoyable if you form your own opinions on the matter. I mean, who am I to ruin a good conversation?

Another thing that surprised me was the rather depressing route it decided to take. Max is not really escaping anything when he goes to the land of the wild things. Rather, he is forced to come face to face with all of his conflicting feelings. This gives way to the large number of underlying domestic issues that lurk behind the film's main events. I honestly question the idea of marketing this film to younger audiences, and apparently the box office agrees me as only a small percentage of tickets sold were child tickets.

I am awarding "Where the Wild Things Are" four and a half stars out of five for being deep, interesting, and very well done, but having a slightly messy start. If you haven't seen this film yet, you should probably reflect on your current lifestyle because you have either become separated from your sense of imagination or you are overworked. Either way, you are cheating yourself out of a great movie experience.

Scary Science!

2009-10-26T18:43:00.009-04:00

Is there a better way to kick off Halloween week than with actual science? I don't think so. What kind of science, you ask? Why, science of the crazy and disturbing nature, of course.

The popular sci-fi blog, i09, recently posted a list of the "25 scariest science experiments" that really makes you wonder why we find "horror" movies to be the slightest bit scary. A good number of the experiments on this list are far more frightening! (Most notably the dog head thing!) Anyway, if you're interested you should take a look. Link below.

"25 of the Scariest Science Experiments Ever Conducted"

Stuck On the Ground

2009-10-23T20:51:00.004-04:00

Acrostic: "A poem or series of lines in which certain letters, usually the first in each line, form a name, motto, or message when read in sequence."

This is the seventh entry in my Acrostic Adventure series. Where is this mysterious woman leading him? Is this just another mind game cooked up by whoever, or whatever, lies beneath the Overlooked City? It seems that those peaceful days have been left far behind.

Stuck On The Ground

Curious thoughts and surreal fantasies
Hover high overhead like
Ancient abstract paintings that were only
Slightly washed away.
Is the veil covering this lost city
Not as thick as he once believed?
Glimpses of color in gray surroundings.

Color that begins to fade as the woman
Leads him deeper into the
Opaque graveyard of cold
Understandings and decayed emotions.
Do not allow peaceful moments to be taken for granted.
Sometimes simplicity is hard to find.

Copyright © 2009 Jarred Lee

The Mysterious Geographic Explorations of Jasper Morello

2009-10-18T01:53:00.003-04:00

The Mysterious Geographic Explorations of Jasper Morello is a short film that was released back in 2005 has received a great deal of praise since then. The silhouette-based art style takes a little getting used to, but it definitely fits with the short's eerily dark mood. Also, allow me to say that this is without a doubt the best short film I have ever seen. Twenty-six short minutes that can easily best many of the recent feature-length releases. The Mysterious Geographic Explorations of Jasper Morello excellent must-see. So what are you waiting for? Watch and enjoy!

Zombieland Impressions

2009-10-15T17:13:00.003-04:00

I will get straight to the point here: Zombieland was definitely a fun movie to see, but there were just too many times when I was disappointed by the lack of zombies. It's "Zombieland!" Come on! Also, I felt like the film leaned too heavily on its "surprise cameo." I won't spoil it for you, and I love the actor/actress as much as anyone else, but there were no zombies during that entire portion and it kind of ended up feeling like a partially unscripted break. A one hour and twenty minute film just doesn't really have time to take a break. Especially one that should be filled to the brim with zombies.

Other than that, the characters were likable (with the exception of Abigail Breslin's kind of pointless "little" girl) and the film was mostly humorous. Some of the jokes were kind of stale, though. Also, the Monday night football themed inserts went from amusing to overused pretty quickly. Especially the whole "double tap" thing. If you leave the theater without understanding that concept then you obviously fell asleep at some point.

I am awarding Zombieland three and a half stars out of five for being fun and never taking itself too seriously, but wasting too much time and having poor zombie management. All in all, I'd say Zombieland is a great film to go see with friends, but don't think too hard about what's going on.

The Bachelor and the Bride

2009-10-12T17:55:00.001-04:00

There's a wrinkle in the water
Where we laid our first daughter
And I think the wind blows so sweetly there.
Over there.

And the windows and the cinders
And the willows in the timbers.
The infernal rattling of the rain
Still remains.

"But I," said the bachelor to the bride,
"Am not waiting for tonight.
No, I, I will box your ears
And leave you here stripped bare,
Stripped bare."

Hear the corncrakes and the deerhooves
And the sleet rain on the slate roof.
A medallion locked inside her hands.
In her hands.

And his fingers, are they telling
Of the barren of her belly?
Do his calluses cure her furrowed brow,
Even now?

"But I," said the bachelor to the bride,
"Am not waiting for tonight.
No, I, I will box your ears
And leave you here stripped bare,
Stripped bare."

"But I," said the bachelor to the bride,
"Am not waiting for tonight.
No, I, I will box your ears
And take your tears
And leave you, leave you here
Stripped bare."

Hey Ash, Whatcha Playin: Little King's Story

2009-10-08T23:16:00.003-04:00

"Anthony and Ashly Burch enjoy videogames, surreal humor, cupcakes, and videogames. In that order."

So HAWP has apparently started back up? And they're already spoofing the Hitler outburst scene from Der Untergang? While actually speaking German (or at least speaking really good fake German)? Awesome. Too bad no one cared about Little King's Story, haha. If you interested in seeing the original scene, then follow this youtube link.

I'm Talking About Wild Things (Where the Wild Things Are mega-post)

2009-10-05T00:09:00.008-04:00

So as you all probably know, Where the Wild Things Are opens in American theaters on October the 16th. As most of you probably know, I am absolutely ecstatic about this film. I honestly can not remember the last time I have said that. Now, I know that most people are interested in the film because of the nostalgia created by the book, but it is really different for me. Don't get me wrong, I loved the book, but the sense of imagination I have seen in the trailers for this film is simply captivating. More like this, Hollywood. More like this.

As an added bonus, this being a "mega-post" and all, I am including a link to where you can listen to a stream of the Where the Wild Things Are soundtrack (which was written by Karen O of the Yeah Yeah Yeahs) in its entirety, and a video of the Where the Wild Things Are book. Now, I am not sure if the video is "official" or not, but it is really well done either way. It reminded me of those video reading tapes we used to watch in elementary school. Anyway, enjoy! See you at the premiere!

Soundtrack by Karen O And The Kids (music player under post opening picture): http://stereogum.com/archives/stream-the-where-the-wild-things-are-soundtrack_092471.html

This Day in Calvin and Hobbes: October 1, 1991

2009-10-01T20:04:00.009-04:00

Teachers. You give them the correct answer, but they subtract points anyway because you didn't give "their" correct answer. This isn't the case for Calvin, of course, but I will just say that I never thought I would get an exam back where all my answers were correct, but I still scored below an eighty.

The funny thing is that after I talked to my professor about the exam, she couldn't even give me a clear answer as to what I failed to do. She even "let" me email her rewritten answers for partial credit. Thank you Wikipedia.

Angels & Demons Impressions

2009-09-30T18:42:00.006-04:00

Ron Howard really did Dan Brown's best-selling novel a complete injustice this time around, as opposed to the great injustice he did to the Da Vinci Code. I mean, the film isn't even set as a prequel! Rarely do I see such a popularity siphoning move. Just because Da Vinci Code is a bit more recognizable doesn't mean that Angels & Demons can't hold its own. I personally prefer it over the Da Vinci Code.

Now, even if you are somehow able to look beyond the many major differences between the film and the book (if you read the book , that is), this film flies through important plot points without stopping for air and then just keeps on flying to the very end. The film flies so quickly, in fact, that you would probably be hard pressed to catch the majority of the character's names. Angels & Demons never allows the viewer to form a connection with anything that is going on because the characters just seem to be jumping from event to event. The downside to this? For all of the chaos, you will still feel every second of this 140 minute disaster.

I am awarding Angels & Demons one star out of five. Not even Tom Hanks could save this mess. The film was a pain to watch and an utter waste of time.

Cirque Du Freak: The Vampire’s Assistant

2009-09-28T21:08:00.004-04:00

When I first saw this trailer, I honestly thought that it was some kind of joke. Hopefully that's what "they" are going for. If that isn't the case, I really don't see this becoming a sleeper hit. Maybe some things should just stay buried?

AWA Follow-Up

2009-09-27T13:52:00.006-04:00

So yes, another AWA (apparently I did a blog entry last year? Wow.) has come and gone. This year I brought my Hufflepuff robes out of retirement, which apparently makes me Cedric Diggory, so the convention was considerably more enjoyable than last year. Everywhere I walked I kept getting "Hufflepuff!" shout outs and I even scored six or so high fives and a few hugs (yes, from girls) so that was cool too. I got photos taken, as well, but that is kind of implied. There was also a Harry Potter photo shoot on that Saturday and it went really well! About twenty or so people showed up (which is pretty huge) and I was the only Hufflepuff so I got my own photo segment when we went by sections. I will refrain from posting pictures from the shoot here, but you can see the full album on my facebook page. Just comment here if you want the link and then friend me. My roommate went as Scar again this year so he got a good number of photos too (but no hugs so I win, haha).

Moving along, beyond taking pictures (photo-shoots and otherwise), the airplane hanger sized Dealer's room, and the equally large Artist's Alley there really isn't much to do at AWA. There really aren't very many notable guests and the panels are kind of dull. The video rooms are fairly interesting, I suppose, but why go to a convention for that? Anyway, I didn't make any purchases this year, which was kind of disappointing because I really wanted a new messenger bag, so walking around the Dealer's Hall about fifteen times got a bit stressful. Oh, and I got pulled over to the MomoCon table (because I'm Vice President of Anime O-Tekku now and I have "responsibilities" and such) for about an hour and a half to sell things and give out fliers so my feet never really got too much rest.

So, that's it. AWA was much more fun than usual for this year, mostly because I didn't bother with any panels and I dressed up, so I will probably go again next year. I want to try to do some kind of cosplay from now on, though, so I am already working on something for MomoCon and beyond. It is a little ambitious, mainly because I am not too sure how many people watched the show, but hopefully it works out. I will reveal the cosplay when I have more things finalized (I want my roommate to dress up as another character from the show).

Hey Ash, Whatcha Playin: Viva Pinata

2009-09-24T20:49:00.003-04:00

"Fathers can game too!"

Haha, I don't quite know what "season" this belongs to. It was good to see an episode completely devoted to Papa Burch though... even if it was kind of lame.

"9" Impressions

2009-09-22T21:15:00.004-04:00

Sorry for the staggered posts. These past two weeks have been hellish.

The thing that hurt the most about "9" was that I was really hoping that it would be good. It had me truly interested from the beginning and it just kept looking better and better. Unfortunately for me, it was terrible. Awful. "9" felt more like an experiment in design than an actual film. It honestly felt like Shane Acker was more interested in how things looked than whether or not his story made any sense. I heard beforehand that the story was muddled, but I had no idea that it was going to be as a bad as it was. At the end of the film, I honestly wondered why any of the main characters ever existed at all. Everything just felt utterly pointless.

I am awarding "9" one star out of five for having good voice acting and decent animation but lacking pretty much anything else. If you're absolutely dead set on seeing this excuse for a film, I suggest you wait for the rental.

Lost at Sea

2009-09-18T15:55:00.004-04:00

Acrostic: "A poem or series of lines in which certain letters, usually the first in each line, form a name, motto, or message when read in sequence."

This is the sixth entry in my Acrostic Adventure series. Is she real? Only time will tell, I suppose. Start running.

Lost at Sea

Cold and hapless bodies
Adrift in sea of apathy.
Steady and unyielding
Tides of anguish and suppression.

Numb souls silently wading towards
Obvious oblivion.

Sudden warmth violently snatches
Him out of this bleak undertow.
A vision of pale beauty slips
Down an alleyway and out of sight.
Open your mind to new possibilities.
Wishes are only as unrealistic as you make them.

Copyright © 2009 Jarred Lee

New Moon Trailer 3

2009-09-15T19:54:00.003-04:00

Not really in the mood to write my impressions on "9," so here's the latest trailer for New Moon. While I already have plans to "enjoy" the film, I have to admit that it doesn't look so bad. From here at least. And yes, that is Dakota Fanning playing one of the "vampires." I'm sure I wouldn't have been surprised if I had given this film any research time, but hey, it IS the "Twilight Saga." Ah well, just see for yourself.

Astro Boy Trailer

2009-09-13T12:29:00.002-04:00

Honestly, I would have posted one of the earlier trailers for this film if I was more interested in it. Don't get me wrong, it looks like it could be good, but I just have my reservations. Anyway, this trailer seems like it is going to be the last one before the film's release, and it's just over two minutes long, so I suppose if there is any one to post then it should be this one. Enjoy.

Portfolio Going Down

2009-09-12T13:57:00.005-04:00

So my web portfolio is going bye bye come September 15th. Bravehost is basically obliterating their free hosting service (we were only allotted 50 mb of space and now their cutting it down to 5 mb!) so until I feel motivated enough to move it to another host I'm just going to let it go. I can understand where the site is coming from, I guess they aren't all that popular and storage is expensive, but this reduction is kind of ridiculous. 5 mb isn't enough to do anything with. So yeah, sorry guys (especially those of you who messaged me about starting up your own page).

Dragon*Con '09 Follow-up (Kind Of)

2009-09-10T20:31:00.005-04:00

So here it is, my D*con follow-up. There was fun, celebrities, and lots of food (most of which was being served to other people). So yeah, I'll start with the staffing portion of the con because that took up most of my time. Well, since I chose a morning shift (7 am - noon) I had to wake up at 6 a.m. each of the days (except Sunday because I stayed up all night at the con) and walk all the way from my dorm to the convention. Now, google maps tells me that this is normally a 45 minute walk... but I did it in about 25 minutes each time. I walk too fast! Anyway, I was on staff for the ConSuite so I basically had to serve food to hundreds of people every morning. On Friday I made about 400 peanut butter and jelly , on Saturday tuna sandwiches, Sunday scrambled eggs and hash browns, and Monday I served old spaghetti and spam. Fun! So that's pretty much it for the work part. Now that I have paid my $20 and worked my designated 25 hours, I am eligible to staff for free at every Dragon*con for... ever? It's a lot of work, but a lifetime pass is pretty much amazing.

Now on to the actual Con part. The biggest pull this time around was without a doubt the celebrities. Friday morning I got the chance to pop in to the Shatner/Nimoy panel it was amazing. You could definitely tell that they are great friends. Anyway, I saw more celebs in the "walk of fame" area (Lou Ferrigno, Tom Felton, Felicia Day, Charisma Carpenter, Julies Benz, etc) and it was pretty awesome seeing them in real life. I know it's cliche, but you never really think about celebs as being real people, which I guess can be blamed on the media. So yeah, saw the celebs, looked at lots of merchandise, sat in on an amazing Buffy/Angel panel, and fell asleep at 4:20 a.m. during a rave (dumb, I know). There are plenty of other stories here, but I'll just keep them to myself for now. I included a little bonus photo at the bottom of this post so I'll just let you enjoy that. I'm already psyched about next year and I can't wait to see everyone in the ConSuite again! Later all.

Surrogates Trailer

2009-09-09T10:31:00.004-04:00

So Dragon*Con '09 finished up Monday and I have to say, it was awesome. I got to meet a lot of celebrities and generally awesome people. I'll make a follow-up post tomorrow or something (I'm still tired!!), but for now just enjoy this trailer.

I don't know how I let Surrogates slip off of my radar! I remember seeing a trailer for it a while back but for some reason I just forgot about it... maybe it was in the despair of the many lackluster films on the horizon. Ah well, Surrogates is expected to open September 25th of this year and I definitely plan on giving it a good watching.

Dragon*Con '09!

2009-09-03T19:16:00.007-04:00

So Dragon*Con 2009 starts tomorrow! And better yet, I am working as a staff member this year! It's my sixth consecutive year attending so I thought I'd step it up a notch. So yeah, the con runs until Monday evening so needless to say, there won't be any updates this weekend. Enjoy your Labor Day (U.S. readers) and if you're going to the con then feel free to stop by the consuite in Hyatt 223/226 for food stuffs and Pepsi products.

If you don't know what Dragon*Con is (and you didn't click the first link and figure it out for yourself) then go to the wiki page and read up.

P.S. William Shatner, Leonard Nimoy, and Patrick Stewart are going to be guests this year (among some really great other guests). Can you say death match?

9 Trailer

2009-09-02T03:12:00.004-04:00

I must admit, I am kind of excited to see 9. Regardless, of course, of the fact that I still dislike Tim Burton (even if he is only co-producing this particular film). Anyways, 9 looks like it has a lot of potential (it isn't going to continue to abuse "3D") and the voice acting cast has a lot of big names scattered here and there so that should be interesting as well. I thought I'd use Apple's trailer page because it has all the nice quality options. Expect to see this film in theaters on 9/9/2009 (which is also, coincidentally, the release day for The Beatles: Rock Band if you're interested).

Ninja Assassin Trailer

2009-08-30T15:54:00.003-04:00

Does this movie look as overblown as it sounds? Yes. Will I most likely be seeing it in theaters? Yes ( oh the things I do for my reviews). Will I be seeing it alone in theaters? Absolutely not. I'll need my humor fallback plan if the film goes bad. Will I like it? Maybe. It depends on whether or not they add an annoying "comic relief" character. That will knock the film down to an instant three stars.

Anyway, if you enjoyed the trailer then expect to see Ninja Assassins in theaters on November 25th, 2009.

**Youtube may take down this particular video at some point, but I have it backed up so I will upload it myself if need be.

inFamous Impressions

2009-08-27T18:30:00.003-04:00

Wow, it has been a long time since I last reviewed a game! Maybe this is as good a time as any to get back on the horse, hmm? And what better game to start back with than the superpower themed, Sucker Punch Productions developed, PS3 exclusive inFamous?

The Plus: Firstly, and most importantly seeing as this is a sandbox style game, the attention to detail around the city is simply amazing. You won't find a cluster of similarly designed buildings in this game. Everything looks unique to its specific location. Alongside this, all of the citizens of Empire City are just as unique and Sucker Punch drafted a host of voice actors to bring each of them to life. I'm not saying any one of them deserve specific names or anything, but you won't get the same droning phrases over and over again. Secondly, the karma system not only serves to add to gameplay time, but gives the player a distinctly unique experience depending on if they are "good" or "evil." This isn't a game that you will be able to just play through once and toss. Thirdly, the powers that Cole (the main character) acquires during the game are comfortably diverse and fairly spectacular. Whether you're electric grinding across a telephone wire or calling forth a lightning storm you will be enjoying every second of it. Fourthly, the voice acting in this game is nothing short of movie quality. Maybe that's why they have a film in the pipeline already? Fifthly, and finally, the game's plot definitely won't bore you. I'm not calling it a masterpiece or anything, but you will definitely feel a connection to what you're doing.

The Minus: First, and kind of ironically, the ending. Sure, it kind of makes sense, but it just wasn't all that satisfying. It does a good job of setting up for a sequel, but I really expected a bit more. Second, the glitches. There wasn't anything too crazy in this respect, but you will phase through the occasional overhang or get shot yards straight into the air when climbing the occasional ledge. Third, the stunts. Sure, I know they don't sound so intimidating when I talk about them here, but you will spend hours trying to get all twenty-one. I promise you. Fourth, and finally, the area-clearing. As you complete missions in the game, you take small portions of the city back from the gangs that have taken over. Now, this is all well and good, but because most of the enemies leave the areas you have taken back there becomes increasingly fewer things to do as you traverse the city. It's kind of like you're slowly shutting down the game.

So there you are, my review of inFamous. I am awarding the game 4 stars out of 5 for being nearly perfect with the occasional hiccup and I definitely recommend it as a buy to any PS3 owner. I hope to play Prototype, what is considered to be inFamous' lower reviewed rival, as soon as I can so that I can review it as well and do a comparison.

Hey Ash, Whatcha Playin: The Sons of Big Boss

2009-08-26T20:45:00.005-04:00

"Can epic music make up for spectacularly bad martial artistry? Your call."

So this apparently marks the end of this season of HAWP! Rejoice! I can't believe the season ended the way it did! I was so shocked when... wait a minute... since when has HAWP been doing seasons!? Well... enjoy the episode and the completely amazing voice cameo at the end. Don't you just love having friends in high places?

Inglourious Basterds Impressions

2009-08-25T18:38:00.004-04:00

I will start off by saying that Inglourious Basterds is an excellent addition to anyone's Tarantino collection. It has the multi-faceted storyline, the "colorful" characters, the smart dialogue, the shocking violence, and the dark humor you'd expect from him and a little bit more on the side. All of the important actors play their roles perfectly and you just can't help but attach yourself to some of them and completely loath others.

Basterds, however, does suffer from a lot of the inadequacies seen in other Tarantino films. Characters disappear without reference, major characters are killed off in "unjust" ways, interesting events are only briefly touched upon (often in retrospect and for seemingly cinematic purposes), and unexplainable gaps in logic are numerous. But, also in Tarantino fashion, none of these issues hinder the viewing of the film in any way. You kind of almost want to kick yourself a little bit for going back and picking up on these things in the first place.

I am awarding Inglourious Basterds four and a half stars out of five for being an excellent, but not perfect, movie-going experience. It is in all honesty a compliment to say that it is another great Tarantino film that suffers from all the usual Tarantino flaws. Go see it and enjoy your nazi scalping!

2012 Trailer

2009-08-23T18:37:00.004-04:00

I have been holding off on this trailer for some time now, but I think it's finally time I post it. As far as disaster films go, 2012 doesn't look like anything special. Expect your standard "there's not much we can do" attitude and unnecessary decimation of major landmarks. Expect your run of the mill "emotional" speeches and cataclysm-induced selfishness. 2012 will, however, be delivering us the pleasure of seeing John Cusack somehow escape a volcanic eruption in an RV, though. I don't know about you, but I'd pay my $8.50 just to see that.

James Cameron's Avatar Teaser Trailer

2009-08-22T10:41:00.004-04:00

http://www.apple.com/trailers/fox/avatar/

So here is your first look at the $300 million movie. I know that a good portion of the internet is ablaze with "meh" discussions about this teaser, and I honestly have to agree with them. Nothing looks spectacular so far and from what I can tell the film is going to devolve at some point into "Pocahontas in Space" (you know what scene I am referring too). Perhaps we're already looking at the most expensive disappointment of the Winter season? Only time will tell I suppose.

Also, as you can see, there is no direct video embed of the teaser in this post. Just click the picture or the link below it to zip on over to Apple's nice little viewing page where you can see the trailer at any quality you'd like. Normally I wouldn't bother doing this, but Apple seems to have dominated the "market" this time on video quality. This is your one Apple. This is your one.

This Day in Calvin and Hobbes: August 20, 1991

2009-08-20T19:01:00.007-04:00

You just can't argue with Hobbes' reasoning on this one. Sure you could run a race without any regard for your limits, but if you fall over dead afterward then you'll never enjoy the fame.

**Note: Happy 200th post! I can't believe it has been this long already!

Daybreakers Trailer

2009-08-19T14:53:00.006-04:00

Finally, a movie coming out in the next six months that I am actually looking forward to. The premise is actually interesting, nothing looks like it will be over-the-top and the cast looks fairly solid. Now, I'm not a huge fan of Ethan Hawke, but he has never really bothered me. Willem Dafoe and Sam "Dr. Grant" Neill are looking great, though. This looks like a "finalized" trailer for the film, but I'll keep my eye out for others.

District 9 Impressions [Possible Spoilers]

2009-08-18T11:17:00.003-04:00

I know a good deal of people disagree with me about District 9, but just hear me out. Yes, the film looked great and was surprisingly impressive considering its budget of $30 million. On the other hand, or whatever appendage you prefer, there were a lot of poor choices made plot-wise that undid the film in a big way.

Firstly, I really think that Neill Blomkamp took his message a bit too far in this one. Most of the humans were portrayed as being unnecessarily cruel and arrogant, even towards other humans, and the aliens were too temperamental and violent to garner sympathy. During one of the most pivotal points in the film I found myself so disconnected from the characters that I didn't really care how the events panned out. In fact, I was kind of hoping that some sort of device would go off (beam, bomb, whatever) that would just blow everyone up. I felt nothing for the characters.

Along these lines, the synopsis for District 9 was very much a lie. I never get the sense that the prawns have found a "kindred spirit" in Wikus. He never really treats them with very much respect, he is only helping them for his own gain, and in a crucial moment he betrays his one and only "friend." Yeah, definitely not "kindred spirit" qualities.

Secondly, and most importantly, I couldn't see why war hadn't already broken out between the two species. The "prawns" were obviously not a peaceful people and we were even shown scenes of them wielding weaponry, both human (for some reason) and their own. Why hadn't they used any of their payload (they had mecha for goodness sake) to break out of the slum and fight back when the humans were openly murdering them and "aborting" (burning) their children? And similarly, why hadn't the humans gotten more violent when the prawns were apparently killing, and on some occasions eating, them? Hell, a guy was torn apart and eaten on what was apparently national television. We are supposed to believe that after twenty years no major conflict has broken out? Come on.

Finally, I found that the cinema verite style became a bit overused and confusing by the end of the film. I wasn't sure when the "cameras" were really there and when they weren't, the mush flying into the screen at every overly dramatic head explosion became annoying after the first three times, and they beat the interview "footage" into the ground. Every time we see something in District 9 we don't need to see an interviewee talk about it. Just let us see what is going on, please. Also, I found that my experience was greatly cheapened by the fact that we were constantly shown interviews where people were talking about events that have yet to be shown in the film. It was as if they kept popping up to say "hey, you're going to be so shocked when you see what happens in this movie! Man, I can't wait to see the look on your face!"

I am awarding District 9 two and a half stars out of five for being visually stunning, but having a weak plot. All in all I was greatly disappointed by this film and a bit ashamed that I thought it might redeem this terrible "summer at the cinema." I guess it's time to see what the Fall and Winter seasons have to offer. Yes, I am looking at you 2012 and Legion.

Legion Trailer (Red Band)

2009-08-16T17:37:00.005-04:00

Alright, before you ask, no this is not a practical joke. Everything (well, probably everything) you have just seen and more will be viewed by thousands this upcoming January. Be very afraid.

*Note: This is the red band trailer so I hope you were expecting some explicitness.

G.I. Joe Impressions

2009-08-15T16:40:00.006-04:00

(Yes, I have been putting this off all week.)

Flawed, predictable, and completely over the top, but not lacking in entertainment. Channing Tatum and Marlon Wayans were very much outclassed and out of place, though. The other actors weren't so bad, but I really would have at least liked to hear the names of their characters more than once. The plot is pretty much what you could have guessed if you looked at any of the posters or saw any one of the commercials: lots of CGI, explosions, and dry dialogue.

What annoyed me most about the film, however, were the terrible segues they used to transition us into flashbacks. At one point a character practically turns to another character and says "hey, you look like you have an interesting flashback for us to see." It was just bad.

Also, the film makes it pretty clear that we can expect to see a sequel in the near future. In fact, it could probably be argued that the film was made as a test to see if the box office would bite or not. I seriously expected an Iron Man-esque "maybe next time" moment.

I am awarding G.I. Joe two and a half stars out of five for being the shallow action film I expected it to be, but not losing my interest. All in all, it wasn't the worst movie I have seen this summer... for what that's worth, at least.

Falling In

2009-08-14T15:35:00.004-04:00

Acrostic: "A poem or series of lines in which certain letters, usually the first in each line, form a name, motto, or message when read in sequence."

This is the fifth entry in my Acrostic Adventure series. As he travels deeper into the city he begins to lose his sense of self. He is standing on the edge of nothingness waiting to fall in.

**The "Overlooked City" is a poem that I wrote a few years ago. If you haven't read it, take a look. [link]

Falling In

A subtle yet enticing fragrance slowly
Pulls him further into the Overlooked City.
Assuaging his senses like a million tiny
Tentacles, anxious to feed an insatiable hunger.
Hold on dearly to what makes you human.
You never know when it will save your life.

Copyright © 2009 Jarred Lee

The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus Trailer

2009-08-13T02:40:00.005-04:00

So here is your first "proper" trailer for Terry Gilliam's long awaited, and long hyped, film "The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus." I must admit my interest for this film has been growing ever since I first heard about it, Terry Gilliam has made some great films in his time but heaven forbid they don't take forever to release, and this trailer definitely sheds a lot of light on the plot and some of the characters. Be sure to take note of the first looks at the "other" faces of the late Heath Ledger's character: Tony. Interesting, no?

Anyway, the film is currently set to release around Christmas of this year (in the States) so be sure to be looking for that. I know I (and whatever friends happen to be within grabbing distance at the time) will be.

District 9 Trailer

2009-08-10T00:37:00.002-04:00

Now I know that almost everyone has seen this trailer, but I didn't think it would hurt to post it since the movie is being released this upcoming Friday. I am going to be seeing it sometime Saturday evening and I am really excited about it. I have seen a lot of other footage from the film in my various expeditions across the internet and I honestly think that it may finally be the film to take this summer's releases out of the terribly horrific to pretty good rut it has been in.

Seriously, I have seen almost all of this summer's big releases and none of the ones that I had high hopes for were able to pull through. Hopefully this film that seemingly came out of nowhere a month or so ago will be able to repair things to some degree.

Blood: The Last Vampire (2009) Impressions

2009-08-07T17:58:00.003-04:00

Now I know that, about a month ago, I said "Blood: The Last Vampire (2009)" looked better than I imagined it would. After seeing the movie in its entirety, I can say that my statement was true... but the real question to be answered is whether or not the movie is any good. The answer? Not really.

Blood was fun to watch, for the most part, as the action sequences we fairly exciting (especially the one with the old man). What really let this film down was the overuse of bad CGI and the ball of pointlessness that the plot balled up into. Now, I am not saying that good CGI makes a good film, but I will say that bad CGI can ruin a decent one. Every slash or bullet wound in Blood was met with cheesy little squirts of poorly CGI'd blood that would have been alright on a small scale, but eventually just became a distraction. As for the plot, characters that you thought might be important were just killed off before you even really got to know their names and seemingly important plot points were skimmed over and vaguely fleshed out. Because of this, the film was never able to get any real footing and by the end it wasn't even all that clear as to what the main character was fighting for at all.

My biggest problem with this film, however, was Alice, the co-main character. After the first half hour or so she really didn't even seem like a character in the film so much as she seemed like some sort of conduit for the writers. She was able to talk about things that she couldn't possibly know anything about and come to realizations that made absolutely no sense but were somehow true. All this while whining, being completely helpless, and somehow handling the fact that her entire life up to that point has essentially been destroyed for no good reason.

I am awarding Blood: The Last Vampire (2009) two stars out of five for having exciting action sequences, but losing track of its plot about half of the way through. I honestly think the creators of the film got tired of trying to pull together a coherent plot and just decided to dash CGI over everything and string it together with a few poorly placed speeches. Not unlike most of the big movies this summer had to offer. And no, I won't point out a couple of examples like Transformers 2 and X-Men Origins: Wolverine. That would just be unnecessary.

Hey Ash, Whatcha Playin: Metal Gear Solid 4

2009-08-05T23:41:00.004-04:00

"The end begins."

So that is it with the filler posts. I've finally eaten an actual meal, even if it was just fried rice and orange chicken (I'm sure that interests all of you).

Anyway, this episode of HAWP was pretty awesome huh? I have really been enjoying these Metal Gear Solid references as of late. Sure you probably wouldn't get this episode if you didn't actually play Metal Gear Solid 4... but too bad! You should quit wasting time and just play it. I've beaten it three times and enjoyed every second of it. Heck, here's an even crazier idea: play the whole MGS series. I know, crazy right?

Also, I think the HAWP crew is going to be going on hiatus for a while. Ash has declared that this episode is the second to last of the "season," but I wasn't aware of an episode count or anything. Ah well, we'll just have to see I suppose.

Recovery Filler: Thank You, My Twilight [LIVE]

2009-08-02T23:02:00.004-04:00

This is without a doubt my favorite song by The Pillows (and that is really saying a lot because I love most of their music), and I was surprised to hear how well it sounds during their live performance of it. Some bands have a lot of trouble with live shows but these guys really nailed it. Feel free to enjoy it as much as I did... oh, and check out more of their music on youtube. I could give you a long, drawn out, history lesson as to why they are worth your time, but just hear for yourself. Oh, and the fact that they've been going strong since '89 may help a bit. I'm just saying.

Recovery Filler: XKCD Pirate Bay

2009-08-01T21:19:00.003-04:00

"We find you guilty of closing your torrents as soon as they finish. Your sentence is unremovable Hungarian subtitles on everything."

I don't think a trial under those circumstances would go nearly as well for me. If I ever seed, it's on accident. Well... unless it's for something that was incredibly hard to find and only has a few seeds. Then I just disconnect the torrent after I finish and then reconnect it days later for only a few minutes. It's always amusing to see how many people have quit and how many people get bumped up from 99.9% after waiting all that time. Hey, don't look at me like that. Torrenting isn't just fun and games, you know. Wait... that doesn't sound right.

Comic courtesy of the always humorous xkcd.

Recovery Filler: Part of Your World

2009-07-31T23:45:00.004-04:00

I am definitely squeezing this in just in time to say it was posted on Friday. Anyway, so a college friend of mine shared this little gem with me a few months ago and to be honest, I'm still not sure if this girl is actually singing this song or not. Sure, I've watched some of her other videos, even some live performances, and I am just too shocked to believe it. But hey, check out her youtube channel and see for yourself. Oh, and make sure to watch her version of "A Whole New World" as well. She just sings Jasmine's part, but it's really good (considering you believe it to be her or not). Another youtube singer created a duet for the song too that has become pretty popular, but I don't like his voice. At all. Click that link if you don't believe me.

P.S. This song is from Disney's The Little Mermaid for all of you out there who didn't have a childhood.

Recovery Filler: Super Effective #2

2009-07-30T19:12:00.007-04:00

So yes, this post will be the first in a hopefully brief series of posts that I will be doing while I recover from having all four of my wisdom teeth taken out. Why not just go on hiatus, you ask? Well to put it simply, because then I would be extremely, extremely bored.

There was a complication during the procedure that dealt with my problem tooth, the wisdom tooth on my bottom left that had come in completely on its side, that involved one of the tooth's nerves having grown into some nerves at the base of my jaw bone. Luckily the oral surgeon I went to is amazing because he realized it in time and after having to prop open my jaw insanely wide he was able to leave part of that tooth in and just sewed the gum over it. He said the skin will just grow over it but he's going to check it during my post-op appointment to make sure. It's kind of weird that a tooth can just be left buried in your gums without any problems, though. But hey, what do I know? My jaw feels like someone stood in my mouth for some ungodly period of time though.

Also, I was lucky that he noticed that the root had grown into the nerves at that point because if he had mistakenly removed it then I might have had some permanent numbness or other such problems.

Anyway, the comic is from a series called Super Effective, which is done by the same guy behind the popular VG Cats web comic. If you can't tell, it spoofs the original pokemon games with surprising accuracy. Enjoy!